I liked the writing What I would learn, because i would learn to cure cancer. I lost my grandpa a year ago and think that if I knew how to cure cancer or at least help it that would be a great thing.
The writing I liked least was the one about the word blue. It wasn't something I really felt I could elaborate on because the word blue means sadness for me.
I noticed that my writings got longer, and seem to have more detail as the semester went on. When we first started I didn't type very much but as we have gotten to the end I typed a lot more.
I think I would change the content of my writing. I know it's called free writing but sometimes I feel like I can get off topic quick, and I don't think that's always a good thing especially if you were writing an essay.
I liked that we didn't do but one essay. I'm not the best at writing essays, so for me that was pretty good. I realize that writing is something that I need to work on.
What I liked the least is that besides our blog I didn't feel like we had any actual homework, and as odd as this sounds I enjoy homework. Even if we had to do a worksheet or hand write a journal.
What I would do differently this semester is maybe try to be more focused on what we are doing. Sometimes I can get easily distracted so being focused on the task at hand would be great.
What I learned about myself is that I don't really enjoy writing very much. The blogs are okay because they are short but if I were to have to write a long essay then I sometimes have a hard time thinking of what to write, and how to put it on paper.
I think maybe requiring the blog to be turned in every week so we actually did it. I can say I'm very good about doing the free writing and saving them but I know some of the other students have been scrambling to get them posted and actually done.
I would give myself an A, because I've been present in class, and I participate in discussion and group work. I have done what is asked of me, and feel like I have done things to the best of my ability.
Friday, May 1, 2015
Wednesday, April 29, 2015
Pigeon impossible..
It was a sunny day and I noticed a
man sitting on a bus bench, and he had a bagel in his hand. I was very hungry
so I went over to the bench and tried to get him to share his bagel with me. I
sat with him for a while and also noticed he had a brief case with him as well.
Since he didn’t want to share the bagel I got into the brief case and noticed
many bright and shiny colors so I decided I might start pushing them to see
what would happen. Many different guns popped out and I began flying around in
the brief case. Then the man wanted to
give me the bagel after he knew that I could push any and all buttons inside
and one was for a missile so he thought he needed to act fast. The man tried to
give me the bagel but I didn’t want to take it because I knew it was a trap.
The man knocked me out of the way from the brief case and took it and he had it
aimed towards the missile so he could go and stop the missile. I followed the
man up into the sky towards the missile because he still had the bagel that I
wanted. When we got closer to the missile the man dropped the bagel down
towards the ground so I followed it so I could have it. After the man blew up
the missile he landed safely back on the ground and he found me there and I was
eating the bagel but I was also trying to pick it up and it was too heavy for
me. The man looked at me and then up at the sky and then put on his sunglasses.
As I was eating the bagel the rest of the missile that didn’t get blown up came
down from the sky and…..(goodbye)
Can you imagine???
Can you imagine if cars
were made of rubber? When I say rubber I mean like what pencil erasers are made
of. It would be like bumper cars all the time. The rubber would have to be hard
enough so it wouldn’t bounce you too far, but also soft enough to bounce. My
thought is that if they are made of rubber maybe there wouldn’t be as many
accidents, but I’m not really sure. The cars would have to be well tested
before they could be sold of course, but I think after they were tested and
everything got the thumbs up they would be so fun. The tires would be similar
to what they are now just a little bit more of the softer side. The insides of
the car would be like they are now unless someone created an engine that would
not melt the rubber of the outside since the engine gets hot. It would take
some great minds and experts to make this become a reality. I think it would
help when 16 year olds go to get there license. They wouldn’t be so worried
since the car is rubber. I’m still thinking bumper cars, and who wouldn’t want
to ride in a bumper car all the time. Sounds super fun to me, and maybe someone
might like this idea and go with it. Who knows, but I will keep on dreaming of
rubber cars. Maybe it’s just me thinking this would be a neat and fun idea, and
a great addition to cars.
I think winning the
lottery would be great. I mean who wouldn’t want to win money? I myself play
the scratcher games, but not a lot. I don’t spend more than $20.00 at a time.
For me it’s just about scratching the tickets. I of course want to win money
but I’m also realistic that I probably won’t win a lot. The most I’ve won is
$100.00 off of a $5.00 ticket. That was exciting, and very shocking that I won
that much. I saved it, and then the next time I won that much I went shopping a
little with it.
What if???
I wasn’t married
I was a boy
My
dad and mom didn’t get divorced
I didn’t go to cosmetology school
I didn’t graduate high school
I were alone
Cars were made of
rubber
Dogs could talk
Divorce
is not my favorite topic, but it is something that happens. I still remember the
day that everything fell apart. I was 13 years old and had gone to my grandma’s
afer school like I always did. Who knew that would be the day that changed
everything. My mom came to picjk me up and she had fire and daggers in her eyes
the second she opened the dooe to come in the house. She told me it was time to
go so I told my grandma I would see her tomorrow but my mom said, “no you wont.
“ I was very scared at that point, and what came next I don’t think I will ever
forget. We went to our house which was maybe a block from my grandparents and
after we got inside that’s when everything went crazy. There were stuffed
animals flying, picture frames being smashed, and then a wedding dress being
cut. Talk about nightmares happeneingn in the day time. I couldn’t believe what
I was actually seeing, and I had no clue what was going on. I also remember the
night my parents told me they were getting divorced. I couldn’t believe that
what I thought a good marriage was, yet it was a lie. I asked many quesuions
through all the tears and didn’t care for the answers, but then I got to the
last one and barely was able to ask it. The question was , “Did I do something
wrng?” Of course they said, “NO:. I just couldn’t grasp what was about to
happen. At the time I couldn’t beliebe it, but now looking back it was for the
best. I use to think what it would be like if they hadn’t gotten divorced and
things hadn’t been awful. I don’t like doing the “what if” because everything
happens for a reason, and I think two of the reasons are my wonderful step
sisters.
Kindness
I feel that there aren’t a lot of
kind people out in the world today. I remember growing up that when someone
would say “Thank you”, I was taught to say, “You are welcome”. I feel like
people in general don’t say those back or even to each other. Why is it so hard
to be kind to someone? For me kindness is a “normal” thing. It’s rare if I
don’t say, “please”, “thank you”, or “your welcome”. It’s funny how sometimes after saying any of
those I’ve been given strange looks almost like the person is asking me, “Why
are you being so polite?”, and to me that’s just what you should say. I was
told the saying, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”
If I were invisible
If I were invisible I would
probably listen to conversations that are taking place. I sometimes want to
know what people are talking about, but don’t want to have to respond. I
sometimes just like being an ear. It can be sometimes a good thing to listen and
sometimes bad because maybe you might hear things you don’t want to hear. I
think of the expression to be a fly on the wall. There have been times where I
know I’ve been the topic of discussion, and would like to know what’s being
said and I know the person or persons won’t tell me so being invisible would
help that
I believe list
·
My
husband is a wonderful man
·
I am determined to reach my goals
·
My family can handle a lot of things
·
You have to work hard to get good grades
I
believe my husband is a wonderful man. He is always doing things for others,
always taking care of me, and just a joy to be around. If someone needs help,
or needs something he will do whatever it takes to either get it for them or
help them to get it for themselves. He doesn’t ask for anything in return he
just does it. I know there aren’t many people that want or will help others and
that’s kind of sad to me. I was working a job that didn’t “fit” me and he
suggested I go to college. I wasn’t sure how I would do that and work a full
time job. He then told me that while I was in school that I wouldn’t have to
work at all if I didn’t want to. I couldn’t believe that he was saying this to
me, and I was excited at the same time. I then thought long and hard about it
and decided that he was right and that I should go to school. I made the
decision with him and I quit my job and started school.
Fabular
I think the biggest
fabular in my life that I learned is how to manage money. I learned that you
have to be smart and not get yourself into debt. I however at the age of 21 did
get myself into trouble. I had a lot of credit cards and they were all at their
limit. I also signed up for a car for the man I was living with. I was young
and thought in love so I thought doing that was a good idea, and I know that it
was not. It has taken me a little while to get my credit to a good place,
because I had to file bankruptcy since the debt was too big to get out from under.
I now know think that credit cards aren’t bad, but they can become that way if
you don’t be careful. I only use them if I absolutely can’t pay cash or use my
bank card.
Love
I remember the day my now husband proposed to me
because it was the day we had a birthday party for my dog Rocco. That day we
went to my sister in laws house with a cake we had bought for Rocco, and my
mother in law was there as well. Both my mother and sister in law had their dogs
too, and we even put birthday party hats on all of them. Then it came time for
presents, and my now husband had me open them. There were some toys, treats, a
rawhide bone, and a really nice picture frame because we had just recently
gotten Roccos picture taken and needed a nice frame. Then he brought another
box and I started to open it and it was one of those boxes that had many
different sizes inside it. I was beginning to get annoyed because of how light
the box felt, and I kind of thought it was going to be empty. I was finally
getting close to the end of the boxes, and noticed Ryan getting off the couch.
When I got to the last box it was tiny, and it had a piece of paper in it. I
looked up confused a little, and then I opened it and it said, “Will you marry me”, and
it also had 3 boxes underneath it, and they said “yes”, “no”, and “maybe”. I
turned around and Ryan was standing behind me with a beautiful ring. I think I
was really shocked because I couldn’t believe it was finally going to happen.
We had been together for 7 years, and I didn’t think we were going to ever get
engaged. I of course said yes, and then I asked for something to mark the paper
with. Then I finally looked and my mother and sister in law and just had this
look of shock and excitement on my face, and they both came and gave me a hug.
Will
you marry me? That is such a wonderful question to be asked. I was with my
husband for ofr 7 years before he finaly
asked me to marry him. I wasn’t sure it was going to happen, but I’m very glad
it did. I love that he asked me t my diogs irthday party. It was such a fun
time , and I’m so glad my mother and sister in law could be there to witness
it. It was a perfect proposal becuaes I could tell how much thought was put
into it. I love my dog very much so to have that memeory is so special to me.
I remember after saying yes I ran out
into the backyard and didn’t know who to call first or what I was doing. I
immediately called my dad first, and after he said congrats he then said “It’s
about time.” That made me laugh a lot beaceuse I thought the same thing, but at
least it finally happened. I then called my grandma and she was so happy, and
she also said tht it was about time. Then we were going home and I called
myfriend tottell her and she was so happy, and also said because she lost a
family member that day, or was losing one. She tried not getting emotional but
it was hard because on one hand she was hapy for me and the other she was sad
fo the lose. Then when I got home I of course had to take a picture of my
beautiful, shiny, and bright ring nnd share it with the world on facebook. I
don’t know why that was so important but I did it. I was so excited to share
with everyone my great news. I was still very shocled and excited the next day.
I went out and bought a bridal magazine and started looking to get ideas. Then
the fun of planning and picking things out wouls soon start and I was so ready
for that.
Fear and memories
I think everyone is afraid of something, and some have
bigger fears than others. For me I have a fear of flying in an airplane. I have
never flown before, but I am deathly afraid of doing it. I don’t honestly know
where the fear comes from, maybe my fear of heights started it. I just know
that I do not want to every get in a plan. Now that does put limits on
vacations, but my wonderful husband drives to wherever we go. Last year we went
to the Mall of America and he drove us there. The drive or ride I should say
didn’t seem that long to me. I like to look at things and to enjoy the scenery
around me. I know that my husband would much rather fly, but he doesn’t push
me. I’m very lucky that he tries to understand even though he doesn’t really
get it. I sometimes tell myself to get over it but then I realize it is my fear
and no one can make me feel bad about it. I do get teased about it quite a bit,
but I have learned to just let it roll off of me and not worry about what
others think. That can sometimes be a challenge but I just try ignoring it or
laugh it off. I remember growing up and my grandpa told me for my 16th
birthday he would take me to the Mall of America if I would get on a plan. The
fear was there then because I didn’t go. So last year when I went it brought
those memories back and that was great. I think holding memories helps when you lose someone you
love and keeps them close to you in a sense.
Some
memories are good and some can be not so good. They can make the days better or
really long I think. For example my grandpa passed away last January and I miss
him every day, but I still have all my wonderful memories to help make it a
little easier. It doesn’t take all the hurt away but it helps me to think about
all the good times. I still talk to him and that helps even though I know he’s
not physically here. A memory that sticks out is that he would pick me up every
morning and take me to school when I was in junior high and we would get
breakfast on the way and then not even a block from school I would have to stop
and go to the bathroom. He would tell that story a lot and it was really funny
and would always make me smile. He loved o tease me and that was ok with me. He
used to say that if he didn’t love me he wouldn’t tease me. Our family likes to
still joke and tease each other and I think that helps all of us not really
accept but maybe deal a little better with the fact that he isn’t physically here
but he is spiritually and in my heart. I see people trying to deal with grief
and its very hard, but I also see those taking it one day at a time. I have a family member that lost her grandpa
as well and she has to post about it on facebook a lot. Now I know that sounds
mean but for me I know I miss him and I love him so why does everyone need to know.
Its noones business but mine and my family. I don’t know if that’s mean or not
but I don’t need to put it on facebook to know I miss him. It still feels like
to me that I will see him this weekend or somethimg even though I know I wont.
I do get to see my grandma and I try to call and talk to her and check and see
how shes doing. She always tells me shes doing fine but I don’t know if I
believe that or not.
Blue
When I
think of the word blue I think of water, the sky, and, many other things. I
like the color blue it’s great. The color blue also makes me think of when
people are sad. It reminds me of the expression, “Why so blue?” I have never
really understood why the color blue is associated with sadness.
List of things I'm passionate about
Family
My
husband
My dog
Working
out
Legos
Reading
My
education
Myself
Food
Water
Legos
Working out
I don’t
remember the exact day that I started working out, but I will tell you I have
come a long way. I remember going to the doctor and talking to her about my
decision and she was very supportive and excited for me. I told her I would
start slow and see how things went from there. I started by doing my own thing
a couple times a week. I then had an opportunity to have a free training
session so I tried that out, and as hard as it was I wanted more. So my husband
and I signed up to be trained four days a week. I think at first I thought we
were crazy, but soon after we started I realized it was working and I would
reach my goal quicker by continuing on. As my weight started dropping I was
gaining not only confidence but muscle too. There were times in the beginning
that I didn’t think I would keep going, but with the results I was starting to
see and the support of my husband and my family I kept on going. There are
still times now a year and a half later that I don’t want to go to the gym, but
after I’m there I don’t want to leave. I have a different trainer then I had in
the beginning, and I really like him. He pushes my husband and I hard, but only
because he says we can handle it. We have been with him for a year and he is
not just our trainer, but also our friend. Sometimes during the workout though
I don’t feel like he’s being friendly, but I know he’s doing what he’s doing to
help us. Since working out I’ve lost 85 pounds, and my husband has lost 120.
It’s so amazing to me how different we not only look, but how we both feel. I
know I feel much better now than I ever did. I have a new found confidence and
I love it. I never wanted to shop much unless I would get big baggy clothes, so
now when I shop I by clothes that show off my hard work.
Video thoughts
I’m not
sure what to think about the video saying that stress can be a positive thing.
I know that when I’m stressed I don’t feel that it’s very good. It usually
makes me feel bad, and I don’t like it. I’m currently really stressed, anxious,
and very emotional. I feel run down not only physically but emotionally and I
don’t think that’s a good thing. I do have support but I think I’ve fallen so
far down this hole that I don’t hear what people are saying. I know things will
get better I’m hopeful it will be sooner rather than later. I don’t like
feeling this way, and I know I’m the only one that can change it. I do worry
about myself and how being stressed affects me. I try to think positively, but
right now that’s a hard thing to do.
Wednesday, February 11, 2015
What I would learn? Why?
If I could learn anything I would learn how to cure cancer, or at least how to minimize it enough that people wouldn't die. My grandpa passed away January 2014 and it was very hard for me, and still is now. He chose to not have chemo because he didn't want to get sicker, and the doctor said it probably wouldn't help much. I think if there were a cure, or at least better options that things would be so much better. It's hard for me to think that he's not here physically. It has to be really hard on my grandma, but she doesn't show it. I'm hopeful that one day someone will first find a cure, and if they don't then maybe something that will give more time. That's what most families I'm guessing would want is more time with those that have gone on. I know that's what I want. I think about my grandpa everyday, and instead of being sad all the time I'm reminded of all the wonderful memories that I have. I will hold onto those, and know that no one can take them away from me.
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